9.13.2010

Nicki Minaj Plastic Surgery. Rumour has it she’s either had ‘cheek’ implants down there, or she wears padding to give her that gravity-defying boost in the bum.

Asked if she was bothered by the rumours, Nicki [said], “Absolutely not! People will pick anything to talk about, and that happens to be the thing at the moment. I love being a conversation piece.”

Before you leave me a bunch of comments like “Who the fuck is Nicki Minaj?” and “zzzzz,” you should know you actually have heard of her before — you probably just didn’t know it. She did that one crappy song with Mariah Carey a while back and she’s the girl rapper in Young Money’s “Bedrock.” Hey, you know that one part in the song where she goes, “Say Nicki don’t stop you the bestest, and I just be coming off the top as bestest?” I always thought she was saying “I just be coming off the top asbestos.” I just figured it was fair warning that repeated exposure to the song might cause mesothelioma of the ear drums. Turns out she was just too lazy to think of another word that rhymes with “bestest.” I guess “Mae West fest” and “recessed breast” would have sounded too cerebral for top forty radio.

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