Avoid Paying Child Support. As parents we are morally and legally obligated to provide for our children, so if you are goal is to avoid paying child support altogether - this is not the place for you. Now with that out of the way - when possible, it is always best for two parents to be able to sit down like reasonable adults and devise a plan that is beneficial to their child(ren) as well as themselves. When parents are unable to reach an agreement on financial matters, one parent will usually turn to the child support court system to step in as a mediator. While this may be the only option for some parents, that doesn't make it the best option. Allow me to give you a few tips on what you can do to avoid being taken to child support court:
1. Keep Communication Open: This is the obvious but often times, most difficult thing to do, especially when emotions are running high and there is still hurt and bitterness over the end of the relationship. Even though the relationship is over, you once cared enough about that person to lay with them and have a child. Keep the communication about your child respectful, peaceful and cordial. Do your best to keep outside influences and other peoples opinions at a minimum. Friends are naturally biased in situations like this, and even though they may mean well - they usually complicate the issue, making it much bigger than it really is.
2. Be Respectful of Personal Space: At this point, the most important aspect of your relationship with your Ex is the parenting aspect. With your romantic involvement being over, there will undoubtedly be new boundaries between the two of you. Respect the personal space of your ex, if they are no longer interested in you - do not try to force re-kindling. If they want you to stop calling them with personal conversations, then keep your communication to things that concern your children together. You do not want your Ex using your child as a pawn so likewise, you can not use your child as an excuse to cozy back up to your Ex.
3. Keep Your Promises: Breaking promises is never cool, and breaking promises to a child is even worse. If you have agreed to send X amount of dollars every week, or committed to ballet lessons, soccer camp, or after school pick up - then keep your word. I understand that unavoidable things may prevent you, but this is when you must return back to tip #1 - and keep the lines of communication open. If you are unable to follow through on a specific task or responsibility, notify your Ex as soon as possible, allowing them enough time to make other plans.
1. Keep Communication Open: This is the obvious but often times, most difficult thing to do, especially when emotions are running high and there is still hurt and bitterness over the end of the relationship. Even though the relationship is over, you once cared enough about that person to lay with them and have a child. Keep the communication about your child respectful, peaceful and cordial. Do your best to keep outside influences and other peoples opinions at a minimum. Friends are naturally biased in situations like this, and even though they may mean well - they usually complicate the issue, making it much bigger than it really is.
2. Be Respectful of Personal Space: At this point, the most important aspect of your relationship with your Ex is the parenting aspect. With your romantic involvement being over, there will undoubtedly be new boundaries between the two of you. Respect the personal space of your ex, if they are no longer interested in you - do not try to force re-kindling. If they want you to stop calling them with personal conversations, then keep your communication to things that concern your children together. You do not want your Ex using your child as a pawn so likewise, you can not use your child as an excuse to cozy back up to your Ex.
3. Keep Your Promises: Breaking promises is never cool, and breaking promises to a child is even worse. If you have agreed to send X amount of dollars every week, or committed to ballet lessons, soccer camp, or after school pick up - then keep your word. I understand that unavoidable things may prevent you, but this is when you must return back to tip #1 - and keep the lines of communication open. If you are unable to follow through on a specific task or responsibility, notify your Ex as soon as possible, allowing them enough time to make other plans.
Consider Bird Nest Custody
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